Yay, I'm filthy rich!

I've always fantasised about a long lost uncle suddenly leaving me in his will, and it looks like that dream might have finally sort of come true.

You see, today I received a letter (not an email) from a barrister (sounds impressive) from Portugal (not Nigeria) informing me that he found my name while searching the public records for people with a similar (but not exactly the same?) surname as his late client Johannes Gitte (so I'm Gitte Gitte?) who died in 2004 boxing day Tsunami. Before his death, Johannes deposited eight million seven hundred and fifty-two US dollars (the fifty-two dollars certainly gives the amount a genuine feeling) in one box trunk / diplomatic personal treasure (huh?) with a security company in Spain (not Nigeria). The barrister now has to present an inheritor to the security company (what's the name of this mysterious company?) before the consignment gets confiscated or reverts to the Bureau of Diplomatic Security (oh no, there's a deadline! I won't have much time to think the matter through!) He suggests that I stand as next of kin, and he'll use his trusted position to secure the relevant documents that will assist my claims (that sounds a tad dodgy - this must be a genuine offer!) Anyway, it's all 100% risk free (phew!) and he's worked everything out (good, again I don't have to bother thinking about it) and once the consignment is released, he and I will share it 50/50.

FANTASTIC! That means my cut is four million three hundred and seventy six US dollars, I think (I'll hire a flunky to work it out for me)

So, the upshot is that I'll be quitting the Arvo Job tomorrow and will immediately start shopping around for a suitable castle (with a moat and drawbridge). Pretty soon I'll have as much time as I need to write whatever I want to write, and I can spent the rest of my time reading, drinking tea, patting cats, and riding my many beautiful paint ponies and palominos. I must say that I, Gitte Gitte, am looking forward to becoming mega rich.

So now if you'll excuse me, I must go email my barrister/partner in crime in Portugal (not Nigeria) so we can get the ball rolling on this matter before he finds someone else to take my place (oh no, another deadline! I'm so panicking! I might miss out on my millions!)